2. A blanket will be nice, and make sure to get something cold to drink.
3. Read things.
4. Later, take a bike ride to the river.
5. Pretend that you don’t have to do laundry or grade papers and that your schoolwork has high stakes and that sometimes you worry a lot. Instead, try to remember that you like your job and that you get to read as much as you can and that your brain is big and rich and getting fuller and that it will never get filled up and that summer is on its way and that there are colors like you’ve never seen here and that this, just this, is enough on a weekend when its sunny.
Hi, friends. So I feel obligated to tell you that I’m buried under a pile of self-pity at the moment. Here’s how the end of my term looks:
I have two seminar papers due on Monday, a week from today. They are both short papers (between 10 and 13 pages long). I have started one of them; I’m five pages in and I have yet to finish explaining my theoretic framework. I haven’t even started the second. This is a tantamount to a disaster.
I have three late papers to grade by Wednesday.
I have seven paper rewrites to grade by next week.
I have twenty-four final projects from my students to grade by next week.
I have final course grades to tabulate.
I have a final teaching portfolio and statement to write by next week.
We’re not even going to mention the hundreds of pages of reading I have due on Thursday, because I’m committed to skipping it.
I’m as sick as a dog. Why, immune system, must you fail me now! On the upside, teaching with a fever was pretty exciting.
So consider this an intermission. I’ll be back in action next week but until then, I just even can’t remotely guarantee that I”ll be around. Or internet-presentable. Or showered. Or even vaguely horizontal most of the time.
So I’m going to hunker down, think about lesson plans and writing seminar papers and not getting sick, and pretend that this day isn’t happening. Wish me luck!
Tasks
1. register for winter courses — these things never go smoothly, do they? but oh well, after all the minor disasters, I’m all signed up for all the courses I want to take!
2. work work work
3. teach
I didn’t really need a prop for these pictures, but I didn’t want to let me coffee cup go…
In other news, potential / beginner grad students, let me say this: make friends, as soon as you can, with your department’s graduate secretary. These underappreciated lynchpins can literally be lifesavers and sanity savers. Case in point: this morning I registered for winter term courses. My PhD is in English with an emphasis in Folklore, so I am allowed to take courses in the English department and the Folklore department. And yet, the computer has a hard time remembering this. So when I woke up this morning and dutifully entered the course registration numbers, the system wouldn’t let me register. Le sigh. Away I went to my email, shooting off a message to the graduate secretary who got back to me within minutes and fixed the problem. The moral of the story: I tried to register, couldn’t register, and was saved by the secretary — all before 9 am. Blamo! So props to you, Mike my Grad Secretary! You made my whole week better.
Tasks
1. scattered student meetings
2. puppy sitting
3. work work work
4. teach
Trappings
dress — Banana Republic outlet sweater — J.Crew outlet boots — Civico 10 tights — Hema necklace — fair trade store in my hometown (Berkeley)
Tales
Seriously, the improvement in photo quality that y’all are about to be privy to is sort of absurd. I mean, I never claimed that this blog was going to feature high quality, artistically pleasing photography; not only am I not skilled enough as a photographer, but I am not skilled enough as a model. For example, here is me, trying to “smize,” which I guess means smile with your eyes:
I couldn’t stop my mouth from smiling, so instead I just have crazy eyes. But anyhow. Even though I’ve never tried to be the most photographically pleasing blog in the webiverse, I am really excited about how much better just getting a new (i.e. not 10 year old), basic, point-and-shoot camera makes this whole endeavor.
In other news, I just spent a half hour talking to a student about a possible rewrite for his paper. He scored a solid B on his final draft, but he really wants to improve it, not just for the grade but because he wants to be better at what he does. So charming! And even though it’s a big challenge for him and more work for me, I want to see this guy do it because I just can’t help loving that drive. Teacher success moment!
1. When friends come over and carve pumpkins with me. I had some epic pumpkin carving fun last night, complete with fall sangria (white wine, honeycrisp apples, triple sec, and a splash of bubbles make for one heck of a yummy beverage), gigantic pumpkins, a pumpkin marble bread that I invented (think marbled brownies but with pumpkin bread instead of brownie. also think of deliciousness), and demonstrably pounds of pumpkin seeds that I’m now roasting.
2. Creative badasses. A few weeks ago, I won a giveaway from Amy at Stylish Year that I’ve been so excited abut ever since. Nova from LVK Paper Dolls generously offered up a customized paper doll of your truly complete with four outfits based on outfit posts and my own personal style. I had a deep and abiding love for paper dolls as a child, so I was pretty juiced about this win and I’ve got to admit, Nova blew me away. See for yourself the fantastic craft-work she produced:
* just in case the watermark doesn’t do the trick, let’s all take a moment to remind ourselves that these images are so totally property of LVK Paper Dolls and may only be used with her, not my, permission.
This last one has an actual, three-dimensional, made-from-tissue-paper skirt. It’s so cool!
Nova was even generous enough to give me a bonus dress so that I can occasionally play princess. It’s floor length and salmon pink (my favorite color), made of fluffy tissue paper and so delicate. I can’t wait to play dress up with my dolls! I can’t recommend Nova more for fun gifts — I keep thinking about how sweet these would be as bridesmaids’ presents (should I ever have bridesmaids).
3. Fall colors practically exploding onto the trees in my neighborhood. Matched with the smells of woodsmoke out of chimneys and the heady aroma of the pumpkins that my house is still full of, these days are just singing Fall to me.
4. Waking up too early on a weekend and being forcibly snuggled back to sleep by a certain boyfriend…
So, friends, what’s making you feel lucky this weekend?
Every once in a while, when the moon is in the right phase, I participate in the FBFF Friend Friday hosted by Katy Rose of Modly Chic. This week’s topic was irresistible to me, because Katy says that she’s “a little obsessed with Halloween, so in the spirit of
getting ready for the event” she’s asking us all to think about “a Halloween themed questions series.”
1. Do you have plans for Halloween? What will you dress up as this year? Okay, full disclosure on this one: I take Halloween super seriously. The thing is, Halloween is my birthday, so it’s a pretty important day to me. It’s also one of the only holidays that, as a kid, I shared with everyone in my community because I’m Jewish and most of America, well, isn’t; so having a holiday that didn’t mean missing school and going to synagogue without any of my school friends understanding what we were doing was a pretty big deal to me. So this year, I’m dressing up as Maria from The Sound of Music and my friends are throwing me a birthday party that will involve karaoke, the handing out of treats to youngsters, and the drinking of delicious mulled cider.
My best friend Julia and I carved this bad boy my senior year in high school. I still think fondly about it, but I’m working on carving an even better pumpkin this weekend.
2. Where do you go for costume and makeup inspiration? I’m a musicals and performances gal all the way. Last year I was Sally Bowles (from Cabaret) and in the past I’ve been the Wicked Witch (pre-Wicked, though), a drag queen, and The Raven. I take this all to a pretty nerdy level.
Last year, as Sally Bowles, performing “Mein Heir” if I remember correctly (which is unlikely given how many birthday drinks I’d enjoyed by that time).
In college, as The Raven; this nerd went not as the bird, but as the whole poem. I still totally wear that Raven headband around the house sometimes just to see what El Boyfriend will do (or if he’ll notice).
3. What was the best costume you’ve ever donned? Though I believe that this year’s costume might be one of my best, my senior year of college, I went as ChiChis L’Jew, my drag queen alter-ego, and it was pretty spectacular.
Oh, ChiChis, you were a loveable trainwreck. There are definitely photos from later in the night wherein ChiChis is on the table, singing Cabaret (I know what I like, okay?) and doing the Cancan by herself. I’m really trying to pretend that ChiChis acts according to her own will, but the truth is that she just lets me unleash my absurdly theatrical side. She’s sort of my Jenna Maroney…
4. What’s the most creative costume you’ve ever seen? Hmm. This is a toughie, because I really love costumes in all their forms, but I’d say that the prize goes to my childhood friend Amy and I, who did paired costumes for years when we were kids. One year we were ketchup and mustard, one year we were grapes (me) and a bottle of wine (her), one year we were a camera with a working flash (her) and the resulting picture (me, in lots of fun poses), and one year we were a mailbox (her) and a letter (me). They were always so much fun (though hard to get into and out of for potty breaks!) We sadly don’t have any digital prints of this, but I’m working on it diligently. 5. No holds barred if you could dress up as anything, what would it be? Cher circa “Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves.” And I would sing. And it would be glorious.
Okay, friends, now I want to know: what’s your Halloween plan this year, what costume will you be wearing, and what’s your favorite costume of all time?
Tasks
1. work
2. group meeting in the library
3. more work
4. teach
Trappings
skirt — Liz Claiborne, thrifted blouse — Banana Republic outlet cardigan — Target belt and cuff — vintage boots — Civico 10 tights — Hema (Dutch Target)
Tales
So, last week was a toughie for me. Honestly, I think I am just so emotionally wrapped up in my students and their success that I got really hammered by their nerves and frustration. This is something I need to work on, because not only does it affect my emotional equilibrium, it also affects my ability to be a good instructor. Let me explain: I was so concerned that my students were stressed and so eager to quell their fears that I let them forget my cardinal rule, which is that the highest good is to try, fail, and try again. This was summed up in one emblematic encounter with the student I call pouting girl. She keeps just giving up, saying that it’s too hard or that she doesn’t want to. So Friday, in an individual conference with her, I finally snapped. Instead of trying to mommy her and sooth her anxiety, I just put the ball in her court. Our conversation went like this:
her: I guess the problem is just that I don’t like writing argumentative essays and would rather write a research paper. me: Well, this is a class based around on argumentative papers, so you’re going to have to try. her: Yeah, I don’t want to. me: (here’s where I stopped coddling her) Okay, then drop the class. her: I can’t; it’s mandatory. me: Well, then drop out of college. Or suck it up and succeed. Now get back to work.
You could say that I was too hard on her, and I’m sure she felt at that moment that I was being harsh. But the truth is, she needs to know that she has choice, agency, and the ability to make an informed decision about her college career. If she is unwilling to even try to pass College Composition, the one and only mandatory class for all graduates, then she should seriously rethink her choice to be here and to be in college. After I realized that she needed some tough love, I suddenly felt a lot better about myself as an instructor. And you know what? She finally started to try and by the end of our meeting, she seemed to have made the choice to succeed. Now, whether or not she fails or succeeds won’t be about how well I babied her but about how well she motivated herself. And that is freeing, for the both of us.
So here’s to a better week and a better teaching philosophy, my friends!
So, did you count how many students were supposed to come see me in office hours today? I’ll give you a hint: it was five. Five students were told that they had to come see me in office hours. Guess how many students came? One. Just one. And that was just the one who had to turn in a late assignment. But don’t fear, Martina! Another came… after office hours were over. Come on, kiddos! What the what? I guess tomorrow’s class session will begin with a “fear of god” speech to them, perhaps with a helpful definition of what this teacher means when she says “required.” Oy vey.
In other news, this outfit is my attempt to look casual and approachable in office hours. I’ve thought a lot about how I dress in the classroom in order to look (and feel) confident and professional in front of the class, but office hours is harder. I mean, in here, I have all these tokens of myself lying about, which perhaps but the lie to any notion of mystery I’m trying to surround myself with. Moreover, I want students to come in here and feel like they’re having a constructive, supportive chat, not being grilled or quizzed or put on the spot. So: jeans. And frankly, since I teach three days a week, I’m more than happy to compromise and wear jeans during office hours so that I can take a break from tailored skirts once in a while! I mean, I only have so many…
Also, this photo represents the true danger of my comfortable-office: I can’t get out of this chair to go home. Too tired! I spent all day in here, plugging away, and I still feel hundreds of pages behind already. Come on, brain, time to get into high gear!
Hi, lovelies. I know I’ve been mostly absent for the last few days, but it’s because moving into a new office is a surprising amount of work. But today we paint and tomorrow we finally move the furniture, books, desk accoutrements, so I expect to be back in action soon. Till then, here’s the color pallet we’ve generated for our office:
